Contentment & fulfillment

2 things which I want, however 2 things which I can’t seem to get. Does chasing of latter bring the former? yet that only sounds contrary.

I love having fun & experiencing new things. Be it getting a new haircut, firing an M16, or learning to drift my car, experiencing something cool & new to me is what I’ve been living for. But then, that fulfillment only lasts a moment, and discontentment sinks in once again until I find another shirt to buy, toy to play with, speed limit to break etc.
Here’s a personal example. I love approaching girls that I do not know, or at least believing & imagining that I can. It is something driven more out of the sense of challenge than the sense of physical attraction, and that challenge is what brings the fulfillment. But this chasing comes from a lack of contentment in the first place, and the success of “fulfillment” only drives the discontentment further.

Fun? Definitely. Fulfilled? Content? Hardly…

The only way then I believe, would be to obtain both at once, but where and what in life gives you that?

Some people tell me God can give you that. I myself am a believer in Jesus Christ, thus making me a Christian. I should consider myself a pretty decent one at that too. I serve in church, read my bible & pray everyday. In fact I’ve been doing this for about 1 1/2 years & have no regrets. Having a relationship with God has given me identity, confidence, peace & security knowing my life is taken care of.
But contentment? Fullfillment? I’ve yet to enjoy that from this Relationship.

Yet somehow, I believe it’s the only way that I may obtain both together, nothing else seems to do it. So this is what I’ll do: 1 month till my birthday, I’ll put all my thoughts, strength & heart into living for Christ and I pray, when I turn 20 heaven will give me 2 presents - Contentment & Fulfillment

It begins today…