I trusted you. When everyone told me to give up I still held on. Even though the voice in my head told me it was impossible, I chose instead to listen to the voice inside my heart which beats a belief that impossible is just a word. I trusted you, but you broke my heart. I stayed up till dawn with the hope that you would not let me down, that you would just do my one small request. But you didn’t…

Why O why, couldn’t you just score 1 goal and beat Sunderland - the most crap team in the premiership? Why O why my Manchester United…



I trusted you. You had me for almost 2 years now and you treated me with such love and made every effort to take care of me. I thought you were the best I ever had, no one else could take me from place to place which such danger, excitement and yet be in total control all the way. I was sure you were the one for me… until that day in the car park. You were distracted by that other beauty and carelessly turned your head. And you know what happened next… you scratched my front bumper against the wall, my flawless white paint is now tarnished with a hideous black blemish… How could you?



Stop doing this to me, I can’t take it anymore! You give me such joy by showing your face so beautifully but only to take it away, along with that joy. Every morning & afternoon you get me talking to my friends about how nice you look today and I assure them that you would be there for me. But just when I really need you, you leave me, and choose to go with that cloud who is always crying. Well I hate him and his depressive ways, cause he cries and cries and spoils my Sunday game of soccer and my Monday game of golf. Please come back, even if its just from 5-7pm. I need you.

If only all love stories ended like “Memoirs of a Geisha” – the sweetest show ever by the way (sorry I just watched it). Even if they are indeed between a fan and his favorite soccer team, a car and her owner, and a psychopath and the weather.

Dark times have befallen the little town of MDC. The dark lord is back and is tightening his stranglehold on the once happy nation of NSFs. The ancient evil known as “regimentation” has resurfaced and the joy that was synonymous with the citizens is quickly ebbing away. Horrible, horrible forces like “booking in” & “roll call” have been let loose on the poor underpaid soldiers. Horrible! Simply horrible!

Gone are the blissful carefree days of OTOT lunch hours, gone are the prosperous times where OIL (Off In Liu) flowed freely. The Golden age of the Tang Dynasty has passed, and a time of social unrest has begun. Disaster! Simply Disaster!

When darkness falls and blinds the people, they will eventually start stepping on each others toes. That is what the coming of the dark lord has caused! NSFs are plotting against each other, once tight fellowships have been split apart, and the outcasts are left to fend off “he-who-must-not-be-named” & his “death eaters” on their own. Already one poor soul has been slain by the “avada kedavra”(In other words he got posted out) and I sure hope a killing spree doesn't start. We have also been frightened into mistrust as we don’t know how many the dark lord has under his “imperious curse” (in other words on his side). Terrible! Simply terrible!

Come on my friends, my once merry gay men. We have got to stick together in this time of oppression. We must not fall to the dark lords evil schemes. United we stand, but divided we will get many extras. Let us not excommunicate any of our fellow comrades but unify as one decisive force. If we look out for one another, and cover each others backsides (not literally please), I am confident that we can march on through this valley of death with smiles still on our faces. However if we continue to exclude & despise one another we will only leave ourselves exposed and naked to the dark lords evil wand. (again not literally please)

So my dear friends, our surroundings may be have been rudely changed and the good ol' days may indeed be gone for a long long time, but we are still the same simple minded, non-combat fit warriors with the same goal - which is to ORD in one piece and as painlessly as possible. Let’s do that together.